Chapter Eight:
Chapter Eight:
What Would You Do??
Emily was shock at her mother's confession. She sat back down to the table and just listened to what her mother had to say. "I know this comes as quite a shock to both of you girls. I was first diagnosis with breast cancer three and half years ago. I had been in remission for two years but nine months ago during my annual check up, I found out the cancer was back and had started to spread. It has advance quickly and I am no longer responding to treatments. The only thing the doctors can do for me is keep me conformable while I wait for the inevitable to happen" Katherine replied
Emily was at a lost for words but Jenny managed to find her voice "So let me get this straight you've known for over three years that you had cancer and what you couldn't pick up a phone and let your own daughters know"
"We didn't have much of a relationship and I didn't want to worry you girls." Katherine tried to reasoned
Emily finally found her voice "That's not it, is it? When you were diagnosis three and half years ago you knew there was still a chance that you could fight and beat the cancer but now you can't beat it and you've obviously have accepted that. That's why for the past six months you've been trying to reconnect with me, You just feel guilty, that's what this is all about, you want me to just forgive and forget everything that has happened. That's why you know Jenny made detective or what unit I work at not because you care but you wanted to make yourself look good. All of this is just an attempt to ease your conscience" Emily said
"Honey, that is not true" Katherine pleaded
"I don't know what the truth is anymore, I just can't handle all this right now" Emily said getting up from the table and walking away. Matt quickly said goodnight to the Lehmans and followed Emily out of the restaurant.
Once in the car, Matt started to drive back towards LA. They drove in complete silence, every now and than Matt would glance over at Emily, she was staring out the window and was deep in her own thoughts. Matt wanted to say something to her, to make her feel better but truthfully he had no idea what he could say and he also had been with Emily long enough to know that she needed time to process before she would open up and talk about it so he left her alone and kept driving in silence until Emily's cell phone went off.
"That's probably Lia" Matt said as Emily picked up her phone and said "Hello"
"Hey, this is your escape call" Lia said into the phone
"Thanks I appreciate it, we already left the restaurant" Emily replied
"Really? So are you going to come by?" Lia asked
"I'm not sure what we're doing, if we do we do if not I'll see you tomorrow" Emily replied "Thanks again. Talk to you later" Emily said before hanging up the phone and went back to staring out the window.
"Did you want to drop by Sloans?" Matt asked
"Not really. I'm not really in a sociable mood" Emily replied giving Matt a weak smile
"Alright, let's just head home than" Matt said
"No, I'm not in the mood to do that either" Emily said
"Ok, well where am I going to?" Matt asked
"Ummm" Emily said thinking "make a left at the next exit I know the perfect spot"
Ten minutes later, Matt pulled into the parking lot of the Santa Monica beach. "Come on" Emily said as she unbuckled her seat belt.
"Em, it is almost 10:00 at night and it is pitch black out there" Matt said
"Please, we can just go for a quick walk along the beach." Emily said
"Fine" Matt agreed. He got out of the car and walked over to Emily's side. Emily got out of the car, she slipped off her shoes and Matt put his arm around her shoulders and headed out on the beach. They walked in silence for a bit until Emily finally spoke "I love everything about the beach, the smell of the water, the wind on my face and the sand between my toes. Even when I was little and things at home and school sucked, my escape was the beach." Emily sighed and stopped walking "I'm a horrible person aren't I?" She asked Matt.
"What? Of course not. Why would you even think that?" Matt asked
"Because by definition a good person doesn't find out her mother has terminal cancer and than practical yell at her before just leaving" Emily replied
Matt turned Emily so they were facing each other and took her hands in his. "I want you to listen to me very closely. Emily, you are the most kind, caring, compassionate person that I know, you prove that every single day. I am a better person for just knowing you. You and your parents have a complicated relationship. You felt used and betrayed. This was a shock to you, your reaction was normal. You are beautiful on the inside and out. You got me." Matt said
Emily smiled "now you're just being mushy but I love you. What am I going to now?" Emily said sitting on the beach.
"What do you mean?" Matt asked sitting next to her
"Do I just forgive and forget the past 33 years and let her back into my life or do I just walk away?" Emily asked
"I can't answer that for you." Matt said "I can only support whatever decision you make"
"Well what would you do?" Emily asked
"I love you and I don't want you to have any regrets. So just listen Ok?" Matt said. Emily nodded her head in agreement. "You know I lost my mother when I was only twelve. Well, that was really hard on all of us. But my father took it extremely hard. He managed to keep himself sober during the day but as soon as he got home from work, he had a bottle to his mouth. And he was a mean drunk. First he was only verbally abusive towards me but it eventually turned physical. He never laid a hand on my brother Jacob. I think it was a combination that he was the baby and I did everything I could to protect him. He was only six at the time; I don't think he even understood what was going on. Anyway, the abuse continued until I was sixteen by than I was too big to bully around. But my dad continued to drink; by all means he was an alcoholic. Nearly ten years ago, he was diagnosis with cirrhosis of the liver. Dad moved in with Jacob and Jacob wanted me to help out but I couldn't bring myself to forgive my dad. I only concentrated on the bad times instead of the good times. My dad wasn't always a drunk. He passed away six years ago but I couldn't bring myself to go to the funeral. Jacob never understood how I could abandon our father when he needed us the most and when I refuse to go to the funeral, Jacob stopped talking to me. I don't want you to wake up one day and realized you made a mistake that you should have remembered the good times. But this is your decision, whatever you decide I'll support you" Matt said putting his arm around Emily's shoulders and pulled her into a hug.
The couple stayed in that position for a few minutes until Emily broke the silence "Matt, let's go home"
"Sure Babe" Matt said standing up; he helped Emily up than they walked back to the car arm in arm. Once inside the car, Matt headed for home. Emily was staring out the window again, she knew she had a lot of things to think about but no matter what she decided she knew she would have someone in her corner and for the moment that was all that mattered.